WTF of the Week: Chris Brown’s ‘Apology’


          World? This is Lee. I didn’t choose to be cynical. I try really hard every day to look at the beauty of life and the miracle of creation. I try to focus on all the good in the world and eschew the negative. I pray to God, create intentions, chant, meditate, praise and worship 24/7 to keep that healthy glow about me and know that the sun will come out tomorrow. That’s right. I fuckin’ love tomorrow! But it is so hard to keep that sunny disposition when assholes like Chris Brown come out with shit like this! 

          Have you watched it? Go ahead. I can wait. It only lasts a minute and a half.  

          O.K., do you see what I mean? Come on Chris! You beat the crap out of Rihanna 6 months ago and all you can come up with is a minute and a half worth of apology that was edited? Did they cut out the other half hour of lamentations or did you not look pitiful enough when you first read your lines?  

          I know, you’re fucked. Your reputation as the nice musical artist is gone. You are just another slime ball that we make sure isn’t on any of our kids playlists and no amount of basketball playing or apologies will change that. You are now regulated to the pantheon of misogynistic douche-bags which includes O.J. and Tom Sizemore. Your cutesy smile is misplaced since you are a batterer and no amount of staged apologies will wipe that away.  

          Perhaps, and I’m just speculating here, if you were genuine in your apology? Perhaps, and once again, I am just guessing at the reaction of the world, if we could see you really be sorry for what you did and show that aside from your Mom and Minister (BTW- aren’t these the people who were guiding you in the first place?) you sought professional treatment from a real psychotherapist, people may take you seriously. Perhaps you can dedicate your next album and give a good chunk of the proceeds to Domestic Violence Education and Women’s Shelters?  

          Regardless, I will now need to detoxify with a high colonic and purge my soul of your image to retain my Zen state after watching your pathetic attempt to humanize yourself. Thanks a lot!

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