What is Romance?

Real Relationship Advice

Longing looks while the house is on fire is always romantic

People are always harping about things being romantic, as if that makes them better. Women are constantly asking us how to make their husbands more romantic and men are always asking what else they could do. CoupleDumb is here to let you in on a little secret that seems to elude the media and romance novelists around the globe: What they show as romance is hardly ever romantic.

Romance is simply a mood. When a woman is requesting a romantic evening she is really asking for the following:

1. Take time to plan things out.

Showing up to your favorite place where you can share an appetizer and a dessert and each get an entrée for less than 20 bucks is great for a movie night but not for romance. Make the effort.

2. It doesn’t have to be expensive, just thoughtful.

A picnic is more romantic than a crowded restaurant. When your wife knows you actually thought about her likes and needs when it wasn’t even her birthday, that is more romantic than beluga caviar on pearl.

3. It doesn’t have to be about sex.

A walk while holding hands and talking about life is romantic. Monkey sex, where you break the headboard, is fun but hardly romantic.

So you are setting a mood of love. Unfortunately, men don’t always see things the way women do. Women tend to see love as affection whereas men equate it more with sex. Both can be satisfied with a nice evening but let’s understand the male of the species a little better.

1. Men want to feel wanted.

We have said this 1 million times. One of the worst feelings in a relationship is to always initiate sex and never receive the same from your partner. When someone makes advances, even if they are unwanted, it does subconsciously get recorded. You are wanted. If you are always initiating sex, you never get to feel that.  Make him feel wanted. Make the effort.

2. Men like to be pursued too.

There is nothing wrong with sending your guy flowers. If you are on a budget, a naughty text message or a simple, ‘I miss you’, will make his day.

3. Make it about him.

Sometimes, if we are tired, it can be all about him. A nice massage followed by a happy ending is just the way to show him you care.

This Valentine’s be there for each other. Be romantic for each other. Be thoughtful and considerate to each other’s needs.

One comment

  • ConnieFoggles

    So true, but as usual this holiday has been commercialized. I’d rather get a massage, some quiet time alone and snuggling than a gift, but I’m a cheap date.

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