Our Shadows Talk About Mackenzie Phillips
The following special WTF rant is brought to you by the collective CoupleDumb shadows of inappropriateness and wronging. Try not to get your hair singed.
Lee says: This is not a typical WTF. I find it kind of hard to be funny when dealing with this topic. I also am posting this on a Friday which also makes this WTF kind of weird. I am also writing this WTF in first person because I think it’s important that you understand where I am coming from. I am a psychotherapist. I don’t play one on TV. I haven’t been in therapy for so many years that I think I can write a treatment plan. I went to school, trained and practiced psychotherapy for over 20 years. I know my stuff and when I say certain things concerning therapy, I have a valid opinion. One proviso to this will be that I never question the veracity of a sexual abuse allegation. I fervently believe that the client will ultimately decide whether the claim is valid or not. I keep those opinions to my self.
That being said, who the fuck is Mackenzie Phillips’ therapist and who the fuck told her that telling the world she had ‘consensual’ sex with her father was a good idea? This isn’t a question of whether you believe the former actress who admits to a 30 year heroine and other drug addiction. This isn’t a question whether John Phillips is an incestuous pig who can’t defend himself from the grave. This has more to do with the word ‘consensual’ and why the fuck Mackenzie had to vomit this story on Oprah and print for our viewing and reading pleasure.
OK, sexual abuse tutorial!
1. A person under the influence can’t give consent! Mackenzie, I know you must have had loads of therapy and if any of your therapists said that this way of looking at your relationship was appropriate, you should get your money back or at least steal their stash of Kleenex.
2. Consent can not be given when there is a power discrepancy. Sort of like when a female inmate has sex with a guard. They are both of consensual age but there is a power disparity. Alas Mackenzie, you felt all empowered saying that you gave consent to sleep with your Daddy but you couldn’t. It doesn’t matter how old you are. Your Dad would always carry the power in your relationship. I am also going out on a limb and assume that Daddy provided you with cash and drugs so he actually paid you for sex. Please see Lesson #1 and find your therapist and kick their ass!
I am sickened by all of this. Instead of people learning about the insidious nature of incest, we will be debating if the dude from the Mommas and the Pappas was a pervert. ‘He’s not around’ to defend himself’ is the cry from all the nay-sayers. So tell me, what the fuck would he have said? No, I didn’t shoot her up with drugs. Or would he just say, ‘Hey at least I never forced myself on her.’ You see, Mackenzie, saying the sex was consensual does not absolve your father from a heinous crime. His peeps will vehemently deny the incest because it is sick and against every ounce of our morality. You need to go back to the couch, sweetie, and work this issue out. There is no consent, just abuse. You were vulnerable and your father had no boundaries.
Here is where I kind of lose some perspective because everyone is using such inappropriate language. Think Inigo Montoya from ‘Princess Bride’, ‘You keep using that word. I don’t think it means what you think it does.’ Mackenzie feels that she is absolving her father of sin by using the word consensual and somehow honoring his memory by waiting to share this golden nugget of a story. Meanwhile, the former wives are disgusted and feel that she is defiling his memory. At the end of all of this, I think the only people who have been clearly abused are us, the American public who is caught up in the conversation. The Phillips’ family needs to get a gaggle or pod of therapists and get to work. This is not a simple case of her word against his. This is a severe family system breakdown while people take sides on the recovering druggy who doesn’t understand what consent means and a dead folk singer with too many wives and kids.
Paul says: I would like to thank the Phillips family for single handedly keeping the mental health industry afloat during these hard times. Please give them a round of applause.