CoupleDumb’s Oscar Predictions

Oscar's getting a blow job. (You knew that I was going to say that.)

It’s Oscar time again and here are CoupleDumb’s predictions. Last year we were correct almost .000073% of the time. We hope to double that percentage this year.

Best Motion Picture of the Year– Hey wait, how about the movie we made with our Flipcam? WTF? Yeah, now it seems we must choose from 10 movies this year because some people felt left out before. We know everybody wants Avatar but honestly James Cameron is a an asshole and we’d rather see his x-wife win it. ’Hurt Locker’ for the hurt!

Achievement in Directing– Yeah, we’ll go double whammy on Cameron and give this to Bigelow!

Performance by an Actor in a Leading Role– We know that Jeff Bridges will win because he is invoking the tried and true ‘do a movie when you are older that tugs at that cowboy theme that us Americans find so fascinating’. Personally, we find them boring and indulgent. Where’s the flash? Where’s the special effects? Nope. Nothing but old men and facial hair.

Performance by an Actor in a Supporting Role– Waltz has taken it in every major competition so far and we doubt that Oscar will differ but to be funny, we’ll predict an upset and say the Rock in ‘Race to Witch Mountain’.

Performance by an Actress in a Leading Role– Sandra Bullock. We’re serious. Nothing funny to say. We love her and if you don’t you must be a sociopath or an alien.

Performance by an Actress in a Supporting Role– We are going with Mo’Nique. We do stress that if she get’s too serious we’ll call her unshaven legs out and back Cruz.

Best Animated Feature Film of the Year– As parents, we can speak on this subject with authority. We say ‘Up’ for the win! It’s a three hanky animated movie for kids that deals with things like infertility, grief, urban sprawl and how we treat the elderly. WTF?!

Original Screenplay– We’ll say ‘Up’ here too because these bastards refused to talk down to kids.

Adapted Screenplay– ‘Precious’! We believe there aren’t enough films about big, black and beautiful women.

Best Foreign Language Film of the Year– No Almodovar?

Original Score– Continuing the ‘Lock out Cameron’, we’ll say ‘Up’!

Come check us out on Sunday, March 7th at 6pmET, blogging the Red Carpet live joined by the Mari- Creator of J-Bug Jewelry! By the time they give out the first statue, we should be well onto our third bottle of champagne! Now kids, we are professional bloggers. Don’t drink and blog!

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