5 Things to Teach your Kids about Marriage

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          It’s true someday your child will grow up and have relationships. This is a good thing. They will love and be loved and someday even marry. We hope they’re lucky and find a partner who loves, respects and honors them. We hope their heartache is minimal. Most parents usually neglect this education. We may make a big deal of teaching them about sex but we don’t even have public education to follow up on teaching them about marriage, relationships and being a good partner. This is why CoupleDumb has created the Top 5 Things to Teach your Kids about Marriage/Relationships:

          1. Love does not hurt. We have spoken at great length about love and this is a point that must be drilled into every child’s head before they become passengers on the SS Co-dependence. Kids learn about love from two places; parents and media. Isn’t that scary?  Can you imagine Edward and Bella are the love role models for our kids? Let us not forget that Mom and Dad have this nasty habit of taking each other for granted and using insults to maintain that lovely passive aggressive tinged tension.

          2. Questions are a great way to get answers. In the game of love, he who has the most information wins. Get to know each other. Show interest in your partner and know that his/her second grade teacher inspired them to play the spoons. Learn about what was important to them growing up. Do they care about family at all? Does your mate like their parents? Most people would be surprised to find out what they don’t know about their partners. This is very important.

          3. If you want something, ask for it (plus: Don’t hold your tongue). Your partner, for all the love they have for you, cannot read your mind. It is tiring for you and frustrating for them. Also, we learn (usually from watching our parents) that we should never be completely honest. While we agree that some things like how many people you have slept with does not need to be discussed, we do think that we need to be emotionally honest with our partners. This means if you do not like something, tell them. Do not spare their feelings because you are setting yourself up for years of the same over and over again.

          4. Spontaneity is code for you are not enough. Life is hectic and with the pressures of a career, a couple can lose a lot of time trying to be spontaneous and creative. Romance is not only the domain of originality. There is nothing wrong with scheduling dates, sex or cuddling. Anyone that tells you differently are usually alone or in horribly dysfunctional relationships. You know we are telling you the truth. Demanding spontaneity is the equivalent as insisting on being treated as an equal. It’s silly.

          5. Love is not enough. You may think that it is but it isn’t. This is one of those after school specials that were never green lit. You know, where the two teens decide to run away and build their lives together because they are in love but end up homeless, turning tricks for Lamont on the mean streets of Hollywood. The same results minus the homelessness and prostitution are true at any age. You cannot build a life solely out of love. Love is an emotion that often fosters other feelings like fealty and comradery. Love cannot ensure that people will work well together which is a foundational aspect of relationships.

One comment

  • Audrey

    The other day, at a gathering of many children and adults, I overheard my son telling a group of new friends…”Your parents are divorced? That is too bad. My parents still love each other and work hard to keep our family together.”

    This is the same boy who will often tell his father…”Dad, you can’t expect Mom to read your mind! If you wanted to wear that particular pair of pants to work, you should have told her or done the laundry yourself!”

    Gotta love my 9 year old! I have trained him well!!!

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