WTF: What The Faith


          We don’t know if you would believe it but we are spiritual people. We know a lot of people see ‘spiritual’ as code for New Agey/Pagan/Wiccan/Hug a Tree while dancing nekkid during the Full Moon that happens during the Winter Solstice. Truth be told we were both raised Catholic and have evolved out of that faith to embrace more Eastern philosophies. However, at the end of the day, Jesus is still a cool dude in our book and our main spiritual connection. So what’s with the declaration? Did CoupleDumb hear a horn or see a some scary guys riding horses? Nothing that dramatic but it is amazing and it has us saying What the Faith?

          One hundred thousand Christians have banded together and under the name ‘Faithful America’ have gone after none other than Glenn Beck for his campaign against Christian Social Justice. Mr. Beck has been preaching about how ‘social justice’ is really code for Nazism and communism. Beck has also recommended that people leave their churches if the pastor mentions social justice. Beck, who considers himself a Mormon, has said things like ‘social justice is about stealing’ and that social justice ‘leads to death camps.’ ‘A Jew, of all people, should know that,’ Beck has said. ‘[Social Justice] is exactly the kind of talk that led to the death camps in Germany.’


          Now Faithful America is chasing Beck through this country running ads reminding Christians that Beck advocates denying any teaching that urges you to give to your fellow man. You see, in Beckland, this leads us to the slippery slope of Nazism. You remember how nice Nazis were, right? Baking cookies for their fellow man? Opening soup kitchens for the downtrodden? Faithful America’s slogan is ‘Driven by Faith, Not Fear’. We think this is genius and it could not come soon enough. We were wondering when Christians would wake up and see that their new spokesperson and news agency, FOX News, was running with the idea that any attempt to help anyone in any way is Nazism/Communism.  Since Fox News is run by backwards, hillbillies who enjoy the company of their underage cousins, allegedly, they probably missed the government lesson that Nazis were fascists which are on the other extreme of the political spectrum.


          But we digress because  this post is to sing the praises of the one hundred, thousand Christians who refuse to be lumped into the fear mongering, idiotic, racist, delusional, paranoid, name calling asses who call themselves the voice of this nation, the little people and Middle America. There is absolutely nothing ‘middle’ about them. They are the extreme of the extremes. They are a mish mosh of  backwoods, closeted Hatfields, flying confederate flags, shouting conspiracy, communism, Nazism to see which words strikes the most fear. They dissect things and twist them until you can read holocaust or genocide (two of Becks favorite words). If they can’t get a rise out of people, they scream reverse discrimination and calmly wait for Obama to rip off his mask and clothes to show the be-grilled thug in a 3X track suit threatening to pop a cap in whitey’s ass while Michele, Malia and Sasha wear their apple bottom jeans and pop their ass to Lil Johns ‘Get Low’.


          We salute you Faithful America. Our hope is that more people wake up and smell the bullshit that Beck, Palin, Williams, Hannity, O’Reilly et.al. are cooking. Let us wake up and remember that America was not founded as a promise land but the land of ruffians kicked out of the ‘decent’ countries. We’re the mutts! And as such we should be loyal and faithful and protect our pack which includes all of us. Not just some and not the fear mongering dips like Glenn ‘I see Nazis’ Beck.

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