WTF of the Week: Merengue King Elvis Crespo get’s accused of getting a solo membership to the Mile High Club.
A woman passenger who sat next to Slippery Hands Crespo says he covered himself with a blanket when he began and then flashed during the manual manipulation of his member. When questioned by the police, Fuzzy Palms Crespo stated: ‘I don’t recall doing that.’
WTF??? We’ve heard of bad lays before, but a bad wank? Seriously, how bad do you have to be that you forget about it within a few hours? We don’t know about you faithful readers but our hands would be feeling pretty used right about now if we couldn’t remember a flicking the bean/spanking the monkey session.
Listen Mr. Suavemente, you are going to need to apologize to that hand pretty damn quick if you ever expect a little dexterous diddling ever again. We suggest a manicure with a paraffin bath to start the evening and some nice piano music (not the Brandenburg Concertos-you know how they scare them). Then you say ‘I’m sorry’ and prepare for a memorable evening.