Who the hell do you think you are?

You’re probably wondering, “Who the hell do these people think they are talking about relationships?” Or maybe, “where do they get off?”   

     The answer: Wherever and whenever we can.  We have 3 kids.

The real answer is take a look at the about us feature and that will give you a brief history of us plus our backgrounds. 

     The most appropriate answers to these questions would be our track record.  We have been married for 20 happy years.  Not 10 happy years, a couple miserable, a few mediocre and several ‘who the hell is this person’ years.  We mean we have enjoyed each other in our marriage for 20 years.  In today’s world, at our age, it is quite a feat.  Sadly, we don’t know any other couple like us and our secret to happiness is pretty simple.  Drugs! 

     But seriously, for our first blog entry we thought we would get serious and give you a taste of our secret. 

     The first secret to a good relationship is prioritizing.  That sounds innocuous enough and conjures pictures of to do lists and hierarchies.  Our use of the word would be an emotional priority.  However, if your issues stem from he wants to hang out with his friends all the time then this secret is too advanced for you guys. 

     Emotional Prioritizing is setting your relationship as a priority.  This means when you argue, you remember that if you win the relationship loses.  Your relationship becomes and extension of who you are.  You retain your individuality but you nurture and care for this relationship like you would a child or a shiny car.   

     Now, don’t get us wrong.  We are extremely competitive but winning a fight about whether the forks should go up or down in the dishwasher or the word ‘across’ should be pronounced with a ‘t’ at the end, is not worth our marriage.  We know it’s not that simple but those are little examples.  How about arguments whether she never initiates sex or he never listens to your needs?  Now did we get your attention? 

     The reality is that prioritizing would help those issues too.  It helps you put your ego to one side and focus on the needs of the relationship.  And, if you aren’t willing to do that then why the hell are you together?        

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