A rescuer is a person who runs in to save the day. A rescuer sees, what they deem to be, injustice and is compelled to step in a take care of the victim and vanquish the persecutor. Many times they are caught in the cross-fire and end up getting hurt. The persecutor turns their attention on them or, most likely, the victim tired of being thought of as useless, turns and persecutes the rescuer. The rescuer thinks they are healthy. They think they are handling themselves so well that they can take on other people’s lives as well. They look down on the victim with pity and with the belief that they cannot handle their own problems. The rescuer becomes a victim when the victim turns on them, saying things like ‘Why me? I do so much for them!’ The rescuer also attacks the persecutor.
We have all been the rescuer. We have all been in a situation where we help someone out because we secretly understand that they are useless. We have all been in the situation where we feel taken advantage of and taken for granted after all of our hard work. We keep our capes in our glove compartment and get all pumped up when we are helping others less fortunate or able than ourselves. Instead of being the obvious victims, we tend to say things like ‘I did all that work and not even a thank you!’
NOTE: Do not confuse being a rescuer with being compassionate. The two ways of being are vastly different. One comes from giving unconditionally and the other comes from believing that you are better than the victim who is unable to do for themselves.
What is the one thing that can save a rescuer? Being Responsible.
Once again, responsibility is the difference between victim consciousness and being healthy. Ask yourself, what would become of your life if you retired your cape and invested all the time and energy on yourself rather than another victim? We promise you that your life will change dramatically for the better and you will find that the drama level will drop to nil.