Love 101

We are pretty sure that there are some people out there who are really good at loving and being in love. We are positive that there are a handful of folks who could teach a class on Love 101 at their local community college or adult center. We are convinced that just statistically there are those couples who do not need to fret or freak about their relationships because they are healthy and good and all the things people dream about. Unfortunately, we haven’t met a lot of those people so we would love it if you would step up.

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The Heart Don’t Know Squat

We are on vacation this week and are especially spending some quality time with our kids. In most cases this means we have three kids talking to us at the same time while telling one to put something down or quit it or sit down or eat or finally ‘it’s midnight! Go to sleep!’ Awwwwww quality time. We have been discussing love myths and we still have a couple more to share with you. Today’s myth is brought to you after watching our kids and too much kids TV.

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Prostitutes make better lovers

The kids are alright. We think. Truth be told we haven’t seen our kids since the last day of school. We basically did a Costco run, bought tons of easy packaged food, bricked up our door and have been living in our bedroom. Sure we can hear them wreaking havoc and we are sure they are doing some kind of construction out there but we stay hidden writing about love myths. Today’s myth has been perpetuated for eons and continues to be among all cultures and forms of media. This myth is one of the worst things a parent can teach their child, aside from eating Cheese nips for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

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More Relationship Myths

Have you heard the urban legend that says all guys and girls are the same? Yeah, it goes something like a guy and a girl are in their car making out in a remote part of a forest. She hears a noise and breaks off a kiss to say ‘What was that?’ The guy, a total stud, by the way, says ‘Nothing but the beat of my heart, Baby’. She buys that stupid explanation and continues her pre-fornication rituals.

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You’re wrong!

Discussing the myths of relationships tends to make us more aware of other twisted beliefs. The more we discuss it amongst ourselves the more we catch people talking serious crap when we go out. From ‘it just happened’ to ‘every couple loses the spark’, there are a lot of stupid ideas of what love and relationship are all about. It is a wonder that we are even able to start a relationship let alone stay together until death do us part.

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Time is not covered by my HMO

We have been talking about the myths of love and there is no bigger myth producer and promoter than the media. In fact, so many of my celebrity smackdowns have been about the media messing us up on a regular basis (that and Lindsay ‘my rock-bottom is so deep that I need a hard hat, ropes and carabineers to reach it’ Lohan’) that we figure you know this already. We are the media and yet are unwilling to continue to perpetrate this crime on society. So, ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, more myths and crap to dispel.

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Love and Genghis Khan. Two great conquerors.

With our kids home, we find that by design we have more conversations and need to answer more questions. We also find that having a child a year away from going to college, we are trying to rack our brains for any lessons that we may have forgotten to give her. Separating laundry? Check. Brushing twice a day and flossing once? Check. Love your fellow man and don’t judge those who are different? Check. Those are all important but what about things having to do with matters of the heart? Have we taught her the important lessons that she will need to protect herself and yet know when to give her precious heart?

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Does love hurt or is it a gas bubble?

CoupleDumb wanted to take a second and send love and felicitations to all the fathers, stand up guys and Mamas out there that do Daddy duty for a child. Thank you for giving of yourself and being there for a kid. We hope your Daddy’s Day was everything that you deserved! Now to business! What’s going on? It struck us last week that we needed to get some focus. We have the kids home for summer and since we would need to sell a kidney and retina to pay for summer camp, they are firmly wedged up our ass while we try to bring you gem-posts like usual.

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