Listen to the Music
Here’s a question. Should you be taking any advice about parenting from a couple who spend 1/3 of their day figuring out how to get away from their own kids?
Lee says: Of course! Parents, let’s be honest here and put our cards on the table. We know you love your kids but honestly, do you really want to be with them every waking moment of every day? If the answer is yes, then you have major problems. Sure, that’s my opinion. I know, your kids are special, talented and butter doesn’t melt in their mouth, but you know what I know about you, you’ve forgotten how to live your life. That’s right. Having a family is wonderful but even if your kids can fart the alphabet, you need to get out and live.
We know this one really well. We live in Miami. My parents and siblings live nearby. Paul’s family lives out of state. We can generally depend on my mother to care for the kids but that comes with a hefty price. How much does she charge us, you ask? I usually pay a pound of flesh with a side of guilt. My mother insists that she doesn’t mind taking care of them and yet gives me truckloads of shit when she does. Then, even before we leave her house she’s asking how quick we’re going to be. This is probably not the best thing to say right before a nice date with your husband. Then I spend my time calculating how long we’ve been out and compare it to the boys schedule being sure to add moodiness, hunger and hyperactivity to the equation.
So why am I saying all this? A parent needs to remember to be an adult. A parent needs to remember what its like to be a husband or a wife. A parent needs to remember that, before the kids, they had a life and enjoyed doing things with other adults. Ah, fuck it. A parent needs to remember that you use to enjoy having sex with the door open and you use to be really loud! Remember?
On Sunday, Paul and I went on a date. We recently decide our 16 year old needed to be given responsibility and now she has officially become ‘The Babysitter!’ We had done some test runs but had not ventured too far from home just in case. This time we drove over a half hour away and went to a movie and dinner. When we got in the car, Paul said something like ‘I love this’ and I turned on the car which switched on the radio. I recognized the song immediately; ‘That’s the way I like it’ by K.C. and the Sunshine Band. I danced as we began to relax and remember that aside from parents we are husband and wife.
We went to CineBistro which, adults if you haven’t gone, you must! The theatre is equipped with yummy, cushy and roomy chairs and if you sit in the front row you have a large ottoman for your feet. You also have a waitress take your order for a yummy meal with drinks to boot! Honestly, the experience was so wonderful that the only thing missing was the ability to remove our pants.
On the way home, we were flirting and would kiss at red lights. As we approached our block, the song ‘Get down tonight’ started. Paul laughed but I became very quiet. Was this an odd coincidence? Was K.C. and the Sunshine Band moonlighting as a couples D.J.? Was God trying to tell us something?
I don’t know the answer. All I know is that we heard His message and did what He asked us to do. We did a little dance, made a little love and got down that night. It was wonderful and I can’t wait to be an adult again.
Paul says: We just moved Ricky out of his crib and into the bottom of a bunk bed. Since I am the nightshift who traditionally handles the nocturnal events of our children, Ricky’s new found ability to roam the house at will has severely put a damper on my sleep. In other words, I am a chronically sleep deprived daddy. I tell you this so that you fully understand that, for me, K.C. is akin to the Archangel Gabriel and his message of love and getting down-ness was fully heard.