How To Be Stupid

THE Relationship Blog


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What are you pretending not to know? Being stuck on stupid is not a good place to be. We here at CoupleDumb know that using the ‘s’ word is bad form and we are completely open to a better vocabulary that holds the gravitas as STUPID! To clarify, this is what we define as stupid: knowing you have a problem, seeing that there are solutions and doing everything in your power to avoid fixing your issues.

There are 4 kinds of people on this earth: those who are clueless as to their issues but know something is wrong and do something about it, those who avoid any discussion that may address their issues and refuse to do anything to help themselves, those who know they have issues but do nothing about it and those who know they have problems and seek help. Stupid people are those who either avoid issues or solutions. Let’s face it, if you are hungry and there is a stack of sandwiches with a sign that says ‘free-take one’, you would eat, right? But no. A lot of people walk by, stay hungry and then tell their friends that they saw a bunch of sandwiches and ‘we aren’t those kind of people who take something that’s free’.

So let’s get down to the real meat of the issue here, if you have a problem (and who doesn’t?) Get help! Life is too short for suffering. You will not win a medal for being the best sufferer in town! You will not get a pat on the back for being someone who endures a life of bullshit! And, just because you have had an issue forever, and perhaps your parents did too, doesn’t make it a legacy that must endure!

Why the rantyness of the post? Easy. We are sick and tired of hearing people bitch about things and not seeking help. We have heard and read about so many individuals who have had a terrible family of origins. They have issues on top of their issues. The way they have chosen to deal with their problems is to ignore them or try to become the exact opposite of the creator of said problems. In other words, if Daddy abandoned you, choose to be the Dad who is there providing for the kids. Unfortunately, so many people get stuck on the doing to make themselves separate and apart from the focus of their issues. What happens is that children of families where a parent abandoned them may become parents who world really hard so that their children have whatever they need but also are never home. Therefore, in their need to provide, they have inadvertently abandoned their family while they work.

The bottom line is BE HAPPY! Work hard to attain your bliss. Do not dwell on your misfortune. Seek out professional help to get a handle on your inner workings, behaviors and patterns. There are a million different routes to gain mental wellness at million different costs.  Wherever you are there is a mental health professional that is offering free or reduced cost help. Take advantage of it and never let money hold you back from being happy. Never let your fear of what you may find out hold you back from jumping into therapy. In all of my years as a therapist and a client, I have never seen anyone go to therapy and discover that they were secretly a mermaid, serial killer or philatelist (stamp collector). You know who you are even though sometimes you pretend not to.

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