Chinese Baby



          It’s Wednesday and we are breaking our traditional midweek post for something a little different. Surprisingly (to us), we’re going to stay with this week’s theme of the qualities of love. Not only do we have love in this post but also there are Chinese babies, people from Ohio, a cleft lip, a link to Paypal, crack addicts, several therapists and a happy ending after ten years. If that doesn’t get your attention then your meds are too strong.


          Paul says: For the last two weeks, we have been doing all of the ‘Love is…’ stuff. Personally, I am surprised that we have come up with so many. I figured that by this point I would be making stuff up, like ‘love is fluffy’. And then our friend, Sara, came over and she sparked one of the qualities of love that, without it, there would be no love.


          Love is courageous.


          In every love story, whether it is an epic romance or your parents’ recollections of their stumbling courtship, there is a moment when one of the people draws in a breath of bravery and makes a declaration of love. It is always a pronouncement that is heard only by the intended loved one as amplified through the beating of one divine heart.


          We know that Sara made this declaration about ten years ago, right around the time that we first met her. It was when she said that she was adopting a Chinese baby. At the time, Sara and Lee worked together at a substance abuse facility handling the mental health of adolescent girls, which, if you know anything about adolescent girls, is like controlling a tsunami by wielding a sponge. To compound things, the girls also had BOTH mental health issues and substance abuse addictions. Did I forget to mention that this was a juvenile justice facility?


          So when Sara said that she wanted to be a parent to a little girl, I just asked her ‘Why?’ Hell, I had a little girl and was actively looking for a suitably cloistered nunnery for her. Of course Lee, in her immitigable style, probed and prodded with sisterly love in one hand and the red hot poker of reality in the other. ‘You are a big white woman who will be raising a baby as a single mother. Do you know how hard that will be?’


          Sara, with tears in her eyes and wisdom that I have seen in very few people, said, ‘No I don’t know how hard it will be. I have no idea. But I have people around me that love me and I think that I can do it. I know that I have the love in me.’ She said all of this with just the barest hint of panic, which I think is appropriate for anybody talking about the possibility of having a child.


          Ten years later, with all of the hoops finally jumped through, she is getting her little girl from China. The picture above is really the baby. She is 11 months old, has a cleft lip, big beautiful eyes and a cuddly nature. And she will be in Sara’s arms in December.  Just in : Try October. Since I originally wrote this, the schedule has moved up and Sara is a little freaked. October people!


          Here’s the Paypal part. Adopting a baby with a cleft lip from China is really expensive. The button on the right is our CoupleDumb version of a collection basket. If you can make a contribution, God will bless you and your karma will be cleared and you will have seven years of good luck and you can make three wishes. But mainly you will be saying thank you to Sara and her courageous love.



          Lee says: I couldn’t write this since I found that my eyes would get very wet and I would get the sniffles. Perhaps its allergies. What I can write without losing control is that I am so happy for our friend. 10 years ago LingLing (that was her fictitious name) was an idea, parenthood en potentia. This baby is blessed to have a mother like Sara and Sara is blessed to have such a beautiful little girl. By the same token, we are all blessed to witness such a miracle. I am grateful to Sara and LingLing for letting us be part of this.


          [We do not usually make collections so, if you are getting this and have never read CoupleDumb, do your due diligence. Check us out on Snopes.com. Google us. But make sure you cough up some cash. Thank you.]

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