Conscious Uncoupling And The Age Myth

Conscious Uncoupling sounds a lot like the premise of an SNL sketch. Even though it is based on Psychodynamic principles and is a responsible way of breaking up, there are still some premises that do not necessarily settle well with reality. One of the reasons that Gwyneth Paltrow gave on her website GOOP for trying Conscious Uncoupling is that people live longer and the idea of a ‘forever’ love is not reasonable. As we grow, we change and so must our relationships. CoupleDumb does not agree.

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Conscious Uncoupling

CoupleDumb does not like to discuss the relationship issues of others. Recently, Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin announced that they were separating. This caused a not-so-pretty rush of jokes and chuckling at what is a very sad reality of some relationships. The gist of the joke was that Gwyneth’s perfect marriage was now over. And to add fuel to the fire, they were not just breaking up but they were practicing Conscious Uncoupling. People leaped on this newfangled break up and cast it into the same heap as Gwyneth’s love of kale, Cioppino and juice cleanses. However, there is something to be said about conscious uncoupling; some good, some bad. This week we will take a critical look at this idea and is it worth a try.

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The Rescuer

A rescuer is a person who runs in to save the day. A rescuer sees, what they deem to be, injustice and is compelled to step in a take care of the victim and vanquish the persecutor. Many times they are caught in the cross-fire and end up getting hurt. The persecutor turns their attention on them or, most likely, the victim tired of being thought of as useless, turns and persecutes the rescuer. The rescuer thinks they are healthy. They think they are handling themselves so well that they can take on other people’s lives as well. They look down on the victim with pity and with the belief that they cannot handle their own problems. The rescuer becomes a victim when the victim turns on them, saying things like ‘Why me? I do so much for them!’ The rescuer also attacks the persecutor.

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The Considerate Relationship

Why is it that we spend so many years in school and never learn the skills to developing successful interpersonal relationships? Instead of teaching kids how to behave in relationships, they learn dysfunction social skills. Cliques, bullying and gossip are the foundational skills to most of our social education. When we consider that most of us began dating and experiencing love while in our adolescents, there should be no wonder we behave with this much dysfunction. It is up to us, then, to teach our kids about interpersonal relationships and this week we will give you a few lessons that may help.

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Relationship Penal Code

Romantic Relationships are considered to be the greatest source of meaning in a person’s life. The research has shown that married people live longer, are happier and tend to be wealthier than singles. With all this good press, it seems silly that people would sabotage their relationships or not get the most of the ones that they are in. This week we are jumping back into the dysfunctional relationship pool and discussing the common ‘relationship crimes’ people commit to destroy and undermine their relationships.

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