May 142012
 

Real Relationship Advice

vibrator 245x300 Burning Out Some Batteries

Slapping some silicone

Burning out some batteries

Riding the crotch rocket

The vibrator is nothing new. Women have been using vibrators for over a century beginning with steam driven massagers. In fact, Hamilton Beach patented the first electric vibrator in 1902 which also happened to be the 5th small appliance they produced. It seems historically that the advent of electricity heralded a multitude of products for women designed to massage and to reduce stress and hysteria. That’s right; vibrators were medicinal back in the day of Freud. Doctors felt that the eliciting ‘hysterical paroxysm’ or orgasm was the only way to treat hysteria. Since Hysteria was named after the uterus, it made perfect sense that the treatment should address the lady’s naughty bits.  Today, the vibrator is as commonplace in a women’s nightstand as the Gideon Bible is in hotels. But, is it really a good thing?

Pros:

Every time a woman orgasms an angel gets its wings. No? Close enough. As we discussed last week, orgasms are not always easy for women. There are a myriad of reasons that may cause a woman to have a difficult time achieving orgasm that vibrators tend to fix. Many women require direct stimulation on the clitoris to be able to climax that regular intercourse does not provide. Many women report that a vibrator is the only way they can climax.

Cons:

Sex is like many other addictive things. And as such, there is a certain potato chip rule: one is not enough. When it comes to sex, the more experiences you have the more you raise the bar on what gets you off. The amount of stimulation provided by a vibrator can literally make you numb to ‘normal’ sex. In other words, your partner will not vibrate or flip their penises 360 degrees. This can affect your ability to achieve orgasm with your partner which could affect your intimacy.

Pros:

Orgasms are great for your health and being able to have them whenever you want makes life a lot easier.

Cons:

Some women develop vibrator dependence (back to the addiction model) and experience frustration when not available.

Pros:

It can accentuate sex play with your partner. There is nothing that says the vibrator is solely for women or that it needs to be used penetratively.

Cons:

Some partners become jealous of your BOB – battery operated boyfriend.

Everything in moderation. The use of vibrators can heighten the sexual experience but should not always be the main course when you are in a relationship.  There is no judgment if you require it to achieve orgasm but CoupleDumb strongly suggests that there should be plenty of discussion surrounding their use when you are having sex with someone. It is hard to compete with something that shudders at adjustable frequencies and has gopher to directly stimulate your clitoris. Men just aren’t built that way.

Lee and Paul

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