Real Relationship Advice
Several things contribute to our mental state. How we feel physically has a lot to do with how we feel emotionally and vice versa. How we react to the ups and downs of life are dependent on many factors as well. Many people believe that anxiety and the ability to relax is dependent on status. In other words, a wealthy individual will experience less stress than someone who does not have money. We believe that the ‘haves’ have it all. In reality, this is not true. Anxiety affects individuals regardless of their bottom line. If there is one silver bullet for those who suffer from anxiety problems, it would be attitude.
Attitude, as defined by psychologists, is the favorable or unfavorable judgment of something. We evaluate things as good or bad constantly. We are taught not to judge. However the mind, the great cataloguer, does this automatically. It is part of the practice of mindfulness to not judge people. But, in the area of attitude towards not only people but our complete environment, our opinion is the crux of how we deal with the situation. For example: If you judge life to be unfair then you will react negatively to crises. If you are hopeful about life then you will see crises as an opportunity. This is not an exercise in positivity but a commitment to an attitude that accepts what is and challenges what is in flux.
As we begin a new month, become aware of how you see life. Many people who think they are positive mistake who they want to be with who they are. If life gives you lemons, what do you do? Making lemonade is a Pollyanna look at reality which may not be grounded. However, maintaining a positive attitude towards life, with a strong hope for the future, is something that grounds you to an encouraging outcome regardless of what it is.
When we become anxious because life ‘lifes’ at us, we are trying to change our reality. Sure, ‘raging against the dying of the light’ is heroic and can be inspirational to yourself and others but that does not necessarily mean that you do not accept your situation. On the contrary, you see where you are and decide that you can still make a difference!
So, as we begin the month of April, do you believe that people are good (generally)?
Do you believe that there is a plan or a purpose to everything?
Do you feel that the other shoe will drop when you are the most happy?
Please respond in the comments.
I can definitely get in a rut with my thinking. I had an issue that I wanted to work out one way, but through no fault of my own it worked out another way. I had to deal with making my attitude positive so that I could get through the whole situation. To make matters worse I had to see posts on Facebook from a couple of people who got the good news that I didn't. I stayed positive but it was hard.
This is going to sound trite, but thank you for this. I maintain that I am a positive person, but am realistic too. Sure, I vent and get anxious when something goes wrong and I fight my hardest to change it. It's not going to be all roses, but the flowers along the way are what I look out for. And I stop to smell them and see their beauty.